Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Move on you... "pedophobiac"

Yesterday was my rest day, normally I’d spend an hour at the gym or out jogging right after work. But yesterday, I was still strained from the ‘superset’ attempt suggested by my spotter a day before (I should've said No..).
The evening was spent sitting in the living room cuddling with dear missus and watching our latest creation - a 3 ½ year old daughter and 2 ½ year old son. My son was with his favorite car zooming in and out of the living room, my daughter was glued to her GameBoy (with the latest game we bought – Piglet and Pooh) and eldest daughter was in her room with a 50/50 chance of either doing her homework or dancing in front of a mirror. The TV, well, it was always tuned to Nickelodeon though the kids were not even watching (nobody dare to change channel!)
Sitting there looking at them was like a therapy to a tired soul. Though the yelling, screaming and ear piecing resonance at time the nuisance to us parents, these actually make our life beautiful. I’m pondering how lucky I am to be blessed with children. "You'll never know how happy children make you until you have some of your own" - this just came to my mind, and it is indeed true.
For parents, you know what I am talking about, and for those ‘planners’ …you don’t know what you’re missing…

Monday, March 27, 2006

Smith Wesson Semi Automatic .45 caliber

"Teacher used hammer to punish pupil"... no shit, I read this in local daily today. Can you fucking believe that! A person, given the trust to educate was acting like nothing less than a loose psychopath criminal. What’s next, a teacher uses Smith Wesson Semi Automatic .45 caliber to shoot under-performed pupil.
Though a case like this does not signify the mentality of the whole teaching profession fraternity, but it takes a nila to screw up the whole milk. In all fairness, teaching is a hell of a tough job to do, teach your kids and see. But commitment, passion and sincerity in educating tell apart the way you react to stress.

Get this; kids nowadays are getting street-smarter than ever. They are so creative and innovative in their own special way - which sometime freak us out big time. It is just us who are so conventional in term of our expectation of a smart kid. It is very much academic in nature, a string of As will be taken as smart kids, those with swerved answers in class are presumed plain dumb. It is the system we live in that makes us the way we are looking at things. We have to reset this screwed-up paradigm.

Was it recently that there was a news on a minister proposing some radical changes to our education system? I missed that one, but if there were, I’d say it is about time. We have to have a system where pupils are encourage acquiring knowledge and expressing thought rather than being pressured to memorize for one whole stretch of year-around-examination.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Social ethic

People are born normal but at a later stage in life, some may develop into full-fleshed morons. These minority goons don’t seem to know how to behave.
Last weekend (Friday) missus decided to take her car for a good wash, a chore that she had been putting off for so long. Not that she take pleasure of the mess, but time had not been there for her. Her daily routine apart from pleasing dear hubby and feeding him with more and more exotic dishes, is sending and fetching the kids to and from school - that includes the extra classes, quran class and in between grabbing groceries. Though the car is easy on mileage but the interior condition was phew…beyond explanation - the kids step on the seat, throwing trash all over with spilt milk and cheap made-in-china McD toys speckled here and there. Missus who at first did her utmost to observe hygiene is now getting used to that.
Ok, back to the story of sending car for washing. So, I thought it was weekend, what he heck lets take the car for washing. So off we went to this car-washing place. It was a drive thru wash, but you had to queue for drying and vacuuming. There were like a couple of lanes for washed cars to queue. After a good drive-thru washing, we got into one of the lane with the least cars on queue; actually there was only one car in front of us. We stepped out of the car and waited at the bench while the workers were busy drying the other car. Lucky for us, just minutes after that, the car in front of us was done with the vacuuming and drying. The owner drove off, and it should have been our turn next. But no…..when I was about to drive the car forward, all of a fucking sudden, there was this Mercedes - model TB (ie. Towkey Babi), driven by a retard gay cut the queue by driving all the way around and reversing just in front of our car. Parked the car nicely and without a friction of guilt, stepped out of the car and acted like he did absolutely nothing wrong.
I thought …what the fucking hell was that. Can you believe that! I was so pissed but woooo…missus was not very happy! Whilst I was still in the perplex state of mind, thinking as whether to go and blow this numbskull brain out, missus was already headed to the worker who were about to work on this guy’s car. Instead of confronting that socially disoriented gay guy, she was flaring at the workers so hard just so that the gay guy could hear it. Whow what a scene that was. And I was not sure what transpired between the workers and this guy, but he later got in his car, made that stupid screeching tire sound and drove all the way around and got into behind our car where it should’ve been at the first place. I saw he was mumbling as he got out from his car.
…well fucker, go and learn from your gay partner on some moral and social ethic in between your foreplay…so one day you sick guys will not be doing something real stupid in public! Ok may be he is not gay, but he sure dressed like one though. What do you expect of a sick person with a chest like a spoon and a belly that resemble nothing less than a ripen buah nangka and yet wearing a body-hugging shirt..

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Potholes...what else is new

Just read a news on a death of a man after a car he was driving hit a flooded pothole. His car skidded and turned turtle landed on a padi field, killing him on the spot. So tragic, leaving a wife and two very young children..
The problem has been rectified (yeah right… a big applause to you sir for job well done…). That seems to be a common phrase heard from the relevant authority when some mishap happened as a result of their system failure. It enrages me to think that they were talking about rectifying the system rather than what that malfunction has caused – in this case a life of an innocent. I wonder what the hell was exactly going through their head when making such statement.
Mr Authority here should have been tied to a pole and shot, instead of giving the instantaneous glamorous press attention to utter such brainless remark about his blunder. If the prevailing law provides an avenue to prosecute a bus driver for getting in an accident that kills, then I don’t see why Mr Authority is an exception here. Both Mr Authority and a Bus Driver have no intention of killing but both have the obligation to ensure the safety of people who rely on them. Same accountability except that Mr Authority could have been paid much much more by taxpayers compared to Mr Express Bus Driver.
Mr Authority should’ve been sacked to the least!
I gues what I am trying to get at here is if it wasn’t for the pothole the man would have been playing with his kids right at this moment.
I am just so ticked off by this that I just could not figure out what else to say..*sigh..*

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Medorthophobia...


Yesterday I was on an alert-mode for the whole afternoon. The school where my daughter is studying was exercising an Emergency Evacuation Exercise with simulated scenario, thus necessitating us to be on standby for at anytime, official from school would be calling us to get our daughter out from school.
According to my daughter, it was their first since the existence of this school to have organized such a drill. Days earlier, the school have given all parents Information Pack about this drill. It contained detailed instruction on how to ‘save’ your kids. The instruction was plain and simple with some colorful cards and map that came with it. So we were supposed to display one of the cards on our dashboard, follow the route that was given, and fetch the kids and go. No waiting and jamming the place – that was written clearly in bold in the instruction.
So when they finally called missus later that afternoon (they didn’t call me), she went straight to fetch our daughter. Though there was some confusion over the selected route (as there were actually two routes depending on instruction on which to take), missus managed it well and was there on time to fetch our daughter. The course went very well and smooth.
This was not a Fire Drill like what we’d normally have, it was an Emergency Evacuation Drill for security reason. Well… the Information pack reassured us the chance of a real security incident at the school was remote, their whole plan was actually represent a sensible level of precaution in preparing us for the unlikelihood of a real security threat.

See the problem with these people, I mean ..... they can act like they’re so freaking concern on the safety of our kids, but actual fact is they’re just shit scared of their own shadows, ergo all the needless, I mean real unnecessary precautious that they have to take (considering where we are now).

See this year alone, the congress butt in with the proposed purchase of a giant oil company and a port management company by one power-emerging Far East Company and a Middle East company. Just Imagine a normal business transaction with no inkling bit of politics in it excited congress to meddle in.

It was the irrational fears that actually brought the congress and whitehouse into this what seems to be a normal ‘Free-Trade’ business transaction. Years after the 9/11, their national system for gathering secrets and predicting threats (ironically called “intelligence”) is still a mess as shown by the unfounded suspicions that the have. Not to mention the system’s colossal failure to figure out that Iraq did not have weapons of mass destruction.

I am sure the linguistic expert can name this type of phobia – unnecessary fear of all possibilities that can be a threat to the nation, I have checked the list of phobia here
O well…..the price that they’re paying..

p/s Fear of Erect Penis – Medorthophobia

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

red ass baboon........

I am flying home end of this month – as usual, a swift three-day trip. Late afternoon yesterday, got an email from my travel agent confirming my ticket, but with a slight change. There will be a transit on my return flight. I can’t fucking believe he passed on that as a “slight change”… no sir, that is NOT a slight change to me, that’s a big change!. I intentionally booked a direct flight for reasons –
  1. I hate transit – it means you are at a place where you are not intended to be - can’t smoke if you remain onboard and even if they let you disembark, I hate wondering aimlessly at the airport (most probably gazing at unaffordable duty free cameras and watches). Have you noticed how transit passengers are actually looked like – well they're all look like zombies walking around with eyes half closed and hairs going haywire.
  2. it’s a godforsaken short trip crossing half of the world, so I want to spend as much time as possible at my destined location rather than at a transit port,
  3. I hate transiting at this part of the world, for some ridiculous reasons the airport security makes you going through their scan and x-ray machine like a thousand and fucketh times before you can actually get your ass back to your seat!.

I am going back to the agent for an alternate direct routing.

I am traveling back every 3 or 4 months. The customary agenda of my flying back goes from settling bills, bills, bills and bills, meeting my kids (don’t ask!), visiting my parents, catching up with friends, and checking out on fuel price back home (just kidding!).

For this visit, I am also meeting an old friend whom I’ve not seen since ‘92. Not that I’m really looking forward to meet this chap but heck why not. This very same jerk gave me a five-inch thick phone directory wrapped nicely as my wedding gift…seriously, I was so upset, bad practical joke, would you think!. Ok pass is pass; I can forget and forgive that.

He dropped me an email asking whether we could meet up (he got my email from my other buddy whom I meet every time I come to KL). The last time I met him, he was on his own doing some businesses of sort. We were actually at one time very close, both were bachelor at that time, we were "ronda-sana-ronda-sini-sama-sama" kinda close you know. I was working fulltime with my former company and he was with this one company owned by our friend.

So things were walking-on-the-park kinda ok until at one point of time, all of a sudden he was acting like an ass, he was avoiding me whenever I went to his office. I thought whatthefuck went wrong, but I didn’t react though (I shoud’ve just reacted then by fucking his brain out for behaving like an extinct red ass baboon). A nice man I was and still am, I just played along but as time went on, it was getting to my nerves real bad. He shunned from talking to me, or made that whatthefuck-are-you-doing-here kinda face when I dropped by his office. Up to certain boiling degree, I thought I’ve had enough of this retard character and stopped communicating with and visiting him. And up till now, I am still unsure what was actually zapping into his brain ….well may be when I meet him later this month, if he seems like he’s recovering well from his brain transplant operation, I’d just ask him.

From the email he sent me he was actually wanted to see me to find out opportunities to venture in this part of the world where I’m working. Depending on what area of business he is into now, I am sure there are always opportunities here. I may help him out by introducing him to few people that I know here.

Monday, March 20, 2006

A pocket money idea...


The Air Conditioner in our master bedroom quit working 5 days ago. No urgent “Work Order” issued by missus yet as the weather now is not that sizzling, not yet. It’s a window-type (I know exactly what you’re thinking, but that is the popular type people use down here). I bought it brand new and installed it about a year ago, so this is kinda premature breakdown I would say.
I am not sure what the problem is, when I turned it on, it made these buzzing and humming sounds which irritate the living shit out of missus (I kinda like it though, I think its cool, that melodious buzzing make me feel like I am in out of space or somewhere in fourth dimension world…..ttzzz…bzzzz…zrrtt. Anyway, as the man of the house, I have tried to fix it (by banging three and half times on that damn thing with my fist), but it didn’t work.
I know this one HVAC maintenance contractor guy at office. I am sure there is not much of a maintenance that he has to routinely do everyday (that explains his walking around and around carrying some screwdrivers and other “look-like-busy” gadget with him and his frequent visit to the pantry). Ok to be fair, may be he does a lot of maintaining work around here, which I don’t know or I don’t really care. So I was thinking may be I should just ask this maintenance guy to fix it after office hour, you know, just some additional pocket money for him.
Well, you know what...I guess this guy must have been so naïve; the concept of ‘pocket money’ did not cross his mind very well. He apparently called his company to arrange someone from there to be deputed to my house. I didn’t know this, so, later that day, there was this gentleman calling me from his office, he was like… “Ok sir, we received your report this morning, we will send one electrician to your house to fix one AC….”, swear to God, he sounded like he was reporting to White House Chief of Staff for sending a troop to Iraq or something. And he was telling me, “... and sir, there will be a call-out rate of $xxx plus actual cost of repair and parts.” Damn, I told him, we were not talking about sending a platoon of technician for HVAC maintenance at some tallest building in the world, and that I just need someone to repair one unit of AC, which would probably gonna cost me something like 2000% cheaper than that…. Then I told him, “…that’s too expensive my friend..”, and he was “... Sir, we are sending one qualified technician with experience, if there is a problem after this, we will remedy for FOC…bla bla…”. I told this Mr CIA guy to just forget about this whole sending troop to Iraq with warranty crap, I’d fix it myself.

O well, may be I will drop by at some electrical shop near my house later.

Sunday, March 19, 2006

For the sake of argument.... yeah right !

I bet you’ve heard that expression like a thousand times through out your career life, especially when you are into some dialogue with colleague, clients, contractors or even your missus. It seems that we sometime utter something without even think of the rationale.

Yesterday I was on the phone quarrelling with one mathafucca asshole who thought that he was a super rocket scientist born from his momma big ass. The argument went on for like 10 minutes before I told him that I’ve had enough of his screwed up theory and I was not going to carry on with the ineffectual conversation. I wanted to nicely put down my phone at that moment, and he was like “oh well… I am not trying to pick an issue or being difficult here, this is just for the sake of argument this and that bla bla bla… ."
See what I mean…why would anyone want to argue just for the unadorned sake of argument?
You would argue for the sake of reaching an agreement, solving something, or attaining to certain concession satisfying both arguing parties.
You don’t argue for the sake of argument, that is it!

Saturday, March 18, 2006

Are we there yet ??

There are just so many e-group on the net, people create group for every darn reason that they can come up with. There are group to name a few, by common interest, by age cap, by profession, by status, by sex orientation or disorientation (I like this…which I frequent more…(lust wife, sex-hungered-widow, lesbo, M&S …) and hell there’re just too many of them.

Well I subscribed to one of these e-groups, an alumnus of our high school some 20 years ago. I am not really an active member like some who shoot emails like every damn jiffy, but I do read all incoming mails from members. Its fun though, it does bring back good ol’memories of student days. The discussion has been always amusing, members are passing jokes, fill in development of other friends, teachers, mak cik dhobi and mak cik dapur, updating how many kids and wife one has, offering opportunities (there are some ‘big’ man here too!) and all.
I kinda lost touch with most of my friends here except for one or two, and the fact that I’ve never turned up to any gathering that the group sometime organize, I could not imagine how these people all look like now. So when reading their emails, I’d imagine the same old silly faces that I know during our schooling days.

But of late, it hit me hard when the matter of discussion revolved around penyakit – gall bladder, diabetes, high blood and all these. It started when one of our friends was telling everybody that he’s recovering from an operation that removed stone which he had suffered for quite sometime. And the thread went on with more and more members telling their pathetic stories. I was like shit, we are getting old, these are all ailments that we used to hear our old folks have, but now we are talking about us suffering them.
Are we that old already???

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Hate it when that happen..


Heck of a dinner we had last night! We invited our dear friend and his wife and son for dinner before they left for the airport. Their flight was at 2.00am, (I just don’t get it why some airlines have to fix their schedule at odd hours like 2.00am, why not make it 10.00pm, well…ok I get it …may be some cheap skates airlines are trying to save costs on foods…expecting passengers to just doze off the moment the plane takes off…hey that’s an idea for my national airline to re-schedule all domestic flight to take off after 1.00am..).

I really ate last night (indirect compliment to missus). I was still stuffed when I went to bed last night. Could not sleep right away like always (missus has been complaining how easy I am to drift into that REM stage of sleep, lay my head on pillow and mere seconds after that…zzz). But last night, I was tossing and turning…I don’t remember exactly when I finally fell asleep. My mind was taking me to almost everywhere, exploring from life, work, family, children to golf…yeah I think golf took 90% of that exploration!

Actually it's easy to become so obsessed with golf that we become gullible to the advice of people who don't have the faintest idea of what it takes to make at least an average golfer with consistent shots all the time. Many people, or at least me, get ripped off by charlatans, believing every single damn thing I read, see, or hear in my quest to get better.

For me, actually it is tough as I started waaayyyy too late, and of course, my special thanks to the unsolicited helps that came from various guru songsang, et-al out there. Thanks guys…you have shaped the way I am now …”fucked up’ golfer that is!

Nothing wrong with starting late actually as most golfers of our generations started late anyway. I bet you’ve never heard someone of our age started golf at 15… we all played football then! Kids nowadays start hitting balls at 9!

But most importantly, we have to start right - with the right guru and technique! Once the posture/muscles are molded and tuned up to the right technique, it is easier to improve with minimal adjustment to here and there along the way. Starting wrong ie. with wrong guru, wrong reading, wrong VCD or whatever possible aide there are, will not only lock our screwed-up style, worse still.. it remains there with a strength of a thousand-army to resist change or adjustment! We are ‘trapped’ per se. For some of us late-starter who fall under this category, we have to live with it. There is no way to mend as “Urat dah liat daaa!!!” Of course, we can play well, score decently, but our names will be forever seen in section C chalkboard! Well… I think I can live with that..

I started golfing when I moved to a new job location, away from the bustling metro life that I spent half of my age, to be honest (albeit, what have been said earlier) I never regret it. It’s a game that I can at least envision to continuously play even after retirement, unlike football or any other physical games. Luckily, my wife, who was raised in a ‘golf playing’ family and relatives understand my passion for golf. So, my waking up so early and timely for golf and so liat for pasar-going ritual is fully understood, and will not be raised as an additional supporting subject in any forthcoming fight, if any..

So, as screwed as I am now, to see that happen to my kid is not a wise thing. I have been telling my wife to have my 2 y’old son (my only son, I have 5 daughters) to take up golf with a proper coaching the minute he can barely lift a 3 iron!

Anyway, golf offers me a great deal of mind control, not to mention temper (as I blow all the time!). I enjoy the man-made challenge in the game - the patient and drive that have to come with it. Enjoy the surrounding - the crowd of gentleman, the green and serenity that go with that.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

go ahead and have a good time buddy...

A colleague is going off for a good two week vacation tonight..lucky dude! He was telling me of his plan bla bla bla which I do not really be envious of though. But one thing that got me is the get-together-for-a-good-round-of-golf-in-KL, that our KL buddy has planned for him! Damn…we both laid-off golf for quite sometime now, for a reason that we are no longer working in a country blessed with courses here and there.

Hope he’ll enjoy the game, and the evil part of me wishing him blessed with OBs…muahahah..

Well…..remind me of old days, bunch of us lazy ass, just waited until 4.30 before we slip out and hop in our cars driving 120Km/hr to the golf course which was not even 1 km away. Driving with one hand while another busy unbutton and changing office smart-shirt to Golf T shirt. And me, I had my CLK golf-geared! (Cute Little Kancil with clubs, used balls, shoes and shirt readily spared in it)

Another friend of mine has this mental strategy that hardly works even with him though. Before any game, he will read the scorecard and set target on each hole to match his handicap, so that he can go par or under eventually. Which hole to enjoy and which hole to struggle are all written and planned for. In a way, when he plays, he will have to stick to the plan. That’s like putting unnecessary pressure on him to meet the target, no matter how relax and compose he'll get.
Imagine if he blows the set target, he will get upset and try to recover from the next hole, and if he fails again, more pressure to recover from the next. And when it goes to the extend of having to get the impossible eagles for the next three holes to recover; he will have to give up the game. I say his strategy is useless (stroke play or system 36) no matter how hard he is trying to preach others to embrace his self-invented strategy!

Another is “playing your best at each hole” and let the score be consequential in nature. Forget about the bottom line, focus on matter at hand, so to say. So if you hit par at index 1 and blow at index 18 in system 36, be it – its your day! This strategy drives you to be more focus, as you are not going to be much distracted by other factors. Its like going along with your games naturally.
Bet there are many more that you may hear or may have heard from your fellow golfers. The point is, yes, mental tuning strategy is damn important in this beautiful game that we all chose to play. Stick to what you believe is your best mental tuning strategy. We are not invented equal, physically and obviously emotionally. So no one formula can fix all or boleh diguna-pakai by all of us.

Get a grip


Life is a physical and emotional journey. Obviously it runs into all sorts of obstacles in our quest to be at the destined destiny. Physical hindrances are seen, unlike emotional. The latter is much more complex, and that’s what would normally turn us up or upside-down, in no particular order! Emotional state makes our day!

The manner we tackle emotional hindrance determines our strength. Wrong address, it goes OB, if you know what I mean. It’s all in your mind – you feed the system wrong, it goes haywire, but if you feed that little complicated CPU with loads of positive inputs, you’d be looking things differently. First swallow these facts of life, one – some shits are within our control and some are beyond, two – things in life do not necessary go the way they’re supposed to be or at least what we perceived they’re supposed to be, three – focus on what is within your power.

Having said and swallowed that, why are we bitchin’ for example when no one is listening or attention goes a little distance from us! Be kind to yourself, these are all external factors that nothing you do can possibly change them, and nosh your system with how wrong those freaks are for discounting you. And believe me, those happy hormone will be released from your system and you would be content and see things differently and boy…..nothing goes any better than a happy person at T box!